35 WTF Wedding Cake Toppers

the weirdest wedding cake toppers

As the institution of marriage has changed, so has the traditional wedding cake topper. I’m not talking about same gender cake toppers, those are hardly odd. I’m talking about THESE wedding cake toppers that exemplify some of the oddest, tackiest and most bizarre nuptials ever.

WTF Wedding Cake Toppers

It doesn’t get more random than this Unicorn Bride and Horse Head Groom Wedding Cake topper

Traditional ceramic wedding toppers by the likes of Lenox, Royal Doulton and Lladro are always the safe way to go. And, of course there are custom wedding cake toppers one can buy that, handcrafted of sculpey clay, resin or a similar material, can be anything you wish. But those cost quite a bit and take time to make.

However somewhere, in some conference room, people got together, presented ideas, approved of them and then went on to mass-produce the following bizarre options.

Who in their right mind would want a high-fiving bride and groom cake topper?
Who in their right mind would want a high-fiving bride and groom cake topper?

These wedding cake toppers are real and sold through various channels. They are referred to as funny or novelty cake toppers when the terms bizarre, offensive and even ‘WTF?’ seen more apropos. Most of these cake toppers are available in either the more expensive, finely detailed porcelain or sloppily cast in resin.

The bare-assed Bride and Groom Cake Topper
It doesn’t get much classier than this.

For the Lascivious Bride and Groom
Because we all know how common a horny bride is.

The Love Pinch Cake Topper

The Humping Bride Cake Topper

The African American version:

The oh-so-common ass grabbing Bride and Groom:

The Obnoxious Cell Phone Bride and Groom Cake Topper:

For the Sports Enthusiast

Bride and Groom Playing Basketball Cake Topper
Because there’s nothing like playing H-O-R-S-E at your wedding reception.

Bride Tackling Football Playing Groom

Bride Tackling Rugby playing Groom Cake Topper:

For all you spies that are getting married, there’s even more than one Mr. and Mrs. Smith-esque Gun wielding wedding cake topper.

Wedding Collectibles Super Sexy Spy cake topper

Better Line® – Sexy Spy Cake Topper:

High Five Groom and High Five Bride are not Geek chic, they are just geeky.

The most popular are the good ‘ol reluctant, runaway and resistant participants. Because there’s nothing more romantic on one’s wedding day than knowing that the bride or groom was coerced, bullied or dragged to the altar. With Caucasian, African American and Same Sex versions available, at least they are equal-opportunity offensive.

Grooms Who Don’t Want To Get Married

Archie McPhee’s Reluctant Groom Cake Topper

Groom on Leash Cake Topper

Wilton Oh No You Don’t Cake Topper

Wilton Now I Have You Cake Topper

Wilton Ball and Chain Cake Topper

Wilton Camo Groom Bride Wedding Cake Topper

Better Line® – Bride Carrying The Groom Cake Topper

Another Bride Carrying a Groom:

Better Line® – Bride Chasing the Groom Cake Topper

Better Line® – Bride Dragging the Groom to the Wedding Cake Topper

Escaping Groom Cake Topper:

Bride Fishing for a Groom Cake Topper:

African American version:

Brides Who Don’t Want To Get Married

Archie McPhee’s Reluctant Bride Topper:

Let Me Go! Cake Topper:

Runaway Bride Cake Topper:

Wilton Runaway Bride Cake Topper

Bride Dragging Bride to The Altar:

Don’t Go Cake Topper:

Groom Fishing For A Bride Cake Topper:

And lastly, the You, Me and My Tractor Cake Topper

Almost all shown here are available in either Caucasian or African American versions.

Most are available through Amazon
Riverbyland Wedding Cake Toppers

Wedding Collectible Toppers

The titles contain links to purchase. If you need alternate races or same sex versions check the following links:
• That’s My Topper
• Ali Express